Friday, July 31, 2009

am i born to be like this?

question for each blog's title. well, it's just some kind of dilemma inside me. i just want to sort
things out.. yeah, it's actually about myself. i thot i had changed a lot compared to my uni time.
I know I wouldn't change my interest (futsal, sports, vid games, music etc) all these were my true
love, so I would never abandon em. as long as my partner is ok with it, then I don't think
there's a prob. my main concern is my personal character. let say the general characters, like
talkative, funny, or friendly.. yeah it's acceptable by everyone. but the boyish thing.. it's still
here, inside me.
ok, before I joined my current company, I was in a banking sector. doing recruitment (HR ppl laa)
I felt that overall, I really changed a lot, matured and start to be very girly.. wear make up, shade beverly hills, MNG, all the brands i guess? with some heels, changed alternately every week. I thot I considered myself a 'woman' already. hehehe.
but once I changed my job, all the girly things slowly vanished.. like a shadow that falls after a moonlight. maybe it suits me as engineer is not the same as HR ppl. I still wear formal in the
office, still have make up with me. but all my previous boyish characters came back. maybe
coz I mix around with the boys back (like my old days). but I dun wanna listen to all the things
back (that I'm a half man etc).. but i did!! oh god.. help me.. am I born to be like this? I want to
be a normal girl.. at least for my character since all my interest are very contradicts with normal
girls. but please... is there anyone out there could teach me how to be a normal girl??

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